Cows

Cows are amongst the gentlest of breathing creatures; none show more passionate tenderness to their young when deprived of them; and, in short, I am not ashamed to profess a deep love for these quiet creatures.  ~Thomas de Quincey


All the really good ideas I ever had came to me while I was milking a cow.  ~Grant Wood


As for butter versus margarine, I trust cows more than chemists.  ~Joan Gussow


A cow is a very good animal in the field, but we turn her out of a garden.  ~Samuel Johnson


The cow is of the bovine ilk;
One end is moo, the other, milk.
~Ogden Nash


When a cow laughs, does milk come out her nose?  ~Author Unknown


I guess cows aren't into the four food groups, especially when they are two of them.  ~Anthony Clark


All is not butter that comes from the cow.  ~Proverb


Opie, you haven't finished your milk.  We can't put it back in the cow, you know.  ~From The Andy Griffith Show


Condensed milk is wonderful.  I don't see how they can get a cow to sit down on those little cans.  ~Fred Allen


The friendly cow, all red and white,
I love with all my heart:
She gives me cream with all her might,
To eat with apple-tart.
~Robert Louis Stevenson


Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 feet per second, is a cow that has been dropped out of a helicopter.  ~Dave Barry


Parties who want milk should not seat themselves on a stool in the middle of the field in hopes that the cow will back up to them.  ~Elbert Hubbard


A mind of the caliber of mine cannot derive its nutriment from cows.  ~George Bernard Shaw


The cow is nothing but a machine which makes grass fit for us people to eat.  ~John McNulty


Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.  ~Proverb


Sacred cows make the best hamburgers.  ~Mark Twain


Who was the first guy that look at a cow and said, "I think that I'll drink whatever comes out of those things when I squeeze them?"  ~Bill Watterson


Milk the cow, but do not pull off the udder.  ~Greek Proverb


If happiness truly consisted in physical ease and freedom from care, then the happiest individual would not be either a man or a woman; it would be, I think, an American cow.  ~William Lyon Phelps


Whoever needs milk, bows to the animal.  ~Yiddish Saying


The human body has no more need for cows' milk than it does for dogs' milk, horses' milk, or giraffes' milk.  ~Michael Klaper


Scoops of mint ice cream with chips of chocolate cows.  ~Jim Bishop, "On the English Countryside," NY Journal-American, 28 September 1957, quoted in Simpson's Contemporary Quotations compiled by James B. Simpson


Tongue - a variety of meat, rarely served because it clearly crosses the line between a cut of beef and a piece of a dead cow.  ~Bob Ekstrom


I'd rather kiss a mad cow on the muzzle than a smoker on the mouth.  ~Paul Carvel


I go about looking at horses and cattle.  They eat grass, make love, work when they have to, bear their young.  I am sick with envy of them.  ~Sherwood Anderson

To laugh is human but to moo is bovine.  ~Author Unknown


There's nothing like sitting back and talking to your cows.  ~Russell Crowe


There's something about getting up at 5 a.m., feeding the stock and chickens, and milking a couple of cows before breakfast that gives you a lifelong respect for the price of butter and eggs.  ~Bill Vaughan


I write in order to attain that feeling of tension relieved and function achieved which a cow enjoys on giving milk.  ~Henry Louis Mencken


Custard:  A detestable substance produced by a malevolent conspiracy of the hen, the cow, and the cook.  ~Ambrose Bierce


He who lets the goat be laid on his shoulders is soon after forced to carry the cow.  ~Italian Proverb


Greatness alone in not enough, or the cow would outrun the hare.  ~Proverb


Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.  ~Dennis Wholey


The mere brute pleasure of reading - the sort of pleasure a cow must have in grazing.  ~Lord Chesterfield