Drinking and driving: there are stupider things, but it's a very short list. ~Author Unknown
Baseball is like driving, it's the one who gets home safely that counts. ~Tommy Lasorda
Honk if you love Jesus. Text while driving if you want to meet him. ~Author unknown, as seen on a church sign
If you must drink and drive, drink Pepsi. ~Bumper Sticker
It takes 8,460 bolts to assemble an automobile, and one nut to scatter it all over the road. ~Author unknown, as seen on a bumper sticker
The problem with drinking and driving is the mourning after. ~Author Unknown
Drive now. Text later. ~Author Unknown
A tree never hits an automobile except in self defense. ~American Proverb
If four or five guys tell you that you're drunk, even though you know you haven't had a thing to drink, the least you can do is to lie down a little while. ~Joseph Schenck
The speedway ends at the cemetery. ~Author Unknown
Texting while driving increases the risk of accident 23.2 times over unimpaired driving. ~Virginia Tech Transportation Institute
One reason I don't drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time. ~Lady Astor
If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. ~Dean Martin
Texting while driving results in longer response times than even drunken driving. While an unimpaired driver can respond quickly to changes in traffic and begin braking within half a second, a legally drunk driver needs four additional feet to begin braking—and a driver who's texting needs 70. ~Virginia Tech Transportation Institute
The driver is safer when the roads are dry; the roads are safer when the driver is dry. ~Author Unknown
Zen martini: A martini with no vermouth at all. And no gin, either. ~P.J. O'Rourke
You booze, you cruise, you lose. ~Author Unknown
The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. ~Dudley Moore
Automobiles are not ferocious.... it is man who is to be feared. ~Robbins B. Stoeckel
A designated driver helps you party another day. ~Author Unknown
Tyrannosaurus drinks. Tyrannosaurus drives. Tyrannosaurus rex. ~Author Unknown
Tyrannosaurus drives. Tyrannosaurus texts. Tyrannosaurus rex. ~Author Unknown
See Dick drink. See Dick drive. See Dick die. Don't be a Dick. ~Author Unknown
Driving hammered will get you nailed. ~Author Unknown
Your body is a temple, but keep the spirits on the outside. ~Author Unknown
Stay alive, don't text and drive. ~Author Unknown
The designated driver—a friend for life! ~Author Unknown
Drink and drive, the police will show you some new bars. ~Author Unknown
How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive? ~Matt Groening, The Simpsons, spoken by the character Homer
What fools indeed we morals are
To lavish care upon a Car,
With ne'er a bit of time to see
About our own machinery!
~John Kendrick Bangs
Drive hammered, get slammered. ~Author Unknown
The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated driver. ~Jay Leno
Recklessness is a species of crime and should be so regarded on our streets and highways. ~Marlen E. Pew
Buzzed driving is drunk driving. ~Author Unknown
Drunk driving is a killer disease. ~Author Unknown
Intexticated: distracted by the act of texting to such a degree that one seems intoxicated. ~Author Unknown
Talking on a cell phone distracts motorists as much as having a blood alcohol level of .08%, and it's shockingly common. Some studies report that as many as 10% of drivers on the road are talking on their phones at any given moment. If your state has yet to ban cell phone use while driving, it's likely that it will in the near future. ~QuoteWizard, based on information from the Center for Auto Safety and Public Citizen
Education is important, but we're to the point where almost everyone knows they shouldn't drink and drive. The people who are still doing it are choosing to do it. The most effective way to deal with them is to arrest them. ~David Kelly, 2002
The greater part of my official time is spent on investigating collisions between propelled vehicles, each on its own side of the road, each sounding its horn, and each stationary. ~An English Lord Chief Justice, quoted in 2,715 One-Line Quotations for Speakers, Writers & Raconteurs by Edward F. Murphy
Road sense is the offspring of courtesy and the parent of safety. ~Australian Traffic Rule, quoted in Quotations for Special Occasions by Maud van Buren
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